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  When I closed my eyes, his image would be before me. I prayed but didn’t feel any relief about the situation in which I found myself. About half way through the trip I decided I must do something. I’ll move to another seat. I’ll not talk to Chet anymore except as a patient to a doctor.

  “But, Rose, I have really enjoyed our company. I have never shared these thoughts with any other person. I think I love you.”

  “Don’t say that!”

  “I can’t help it. We have been sharing our thoughts and our wishes for the future. I want my future to be with you. I do love you and I think you love me.”

  “Please don’t. I’m engaged to another man. I’m going to be married. By this time next month I will be married. Please don’t say you love me? I don’t, I can’t love you. Please don’t speak to me again.” I turned and walked to the end of the car and sat down facing away from him. My heart felt like it was breaking. I couldn’t swallow the lump in my throat. My breathing was erratic. I must get a grip on myself.

  When the porter came by, I asked for a glass of water. I drank it down in one big gulp, leaned back against the seat and looked out the window.

  How different the landscape had become. For hundreds of miles I hadn’t seen a tree or shrub except sage bush and mesquite trees with thorns from two to six inches long. The soil is sand and gravel and the mountains, when we came to them, there weren’t that many, were naked rock and small stones, with no vegetation whatever. Now and then I would see an evergreen bush and now and then a small tree, which I was told were Cedar trees. But of all the scenery I saw appears tame by the sight of what we passed through. It was a very long tunnel. The darkness seemed to overwhelm me as I couldn’t see my hand in front of my face. The porter soon came and lit lamps so those that were afraid could breathe easy.

  Do you know how hard it is to stay away from someone on a train? I asked the conductor if I could move to another car.

  “The train is full, miss. I’m very sorry. There are some seats in second class, but I don’t think you would be comfortable there.”

  “Thank you, I’ll stay where I’m at.” I saw Chet every morning. I saw him in the dining car. I saw him in my dreams. I couldn’t get away from him. His image was burned into my brain. I wasn’t able to eat. I tried reading, but I couldn’t concentrate. I felt like I was going crazy. The only consolation I had was we were getting closer to my destination.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  The train pulled into the Bufford train depot on August eighth, right on schedule. I had changed into my best, cleanest dress for the occasion. I waited and tried not to look at Chet as he departed the train. I tried pressing the wrinkles out of my dress with my hands which were shaking, I was so nervous.

  “Please dear Lord, give me the strength I need to follow through with this obligation.” I felt a little easier after the prayer. I usually felt better after talking with God. I picked up my bag and walked to the door of the train. I started to step down and there before me was a giant of a man.

  He was probably six feet seven inches, weighed close to four hundred pounds, dressed in dungarees, a striped shirt, with sleeves rolled up and a sloppy felt hat. He had a scraggly beard that he spit between to the side of the step. When I looked up at his face, I saw the kindest and the prettiest cool blue eyes I had ever seen.

  “You must be Rose? I’m Roscoe.” He reached to help me down from the train. I automatically recoiled at his touch.

  Could this giant of a man be my Roscoe, my future husband? He looked nothing like his letter had described. I quickly got control of myself and reached for his hand to steady myself as I stepped onto the wooden platform. As my foot touched the wood, I noticed out of the corner of my eye, Dr. Chester Wainsworth standing watching me. I averted my eyes back to Roscoe.

  “You’re sure a fine looking woman. Rose, I’m gonna be mighty proud to say you’re my wife. The preacher’s waiting at the church, if you’re ready.” He held out his arm. I touched it as I encircled my arm in his. There was no tingle, no fluttering. Just the touch of bare flesh on flesh.

  “We need to pick up my trunk at the freight platform. You do have a wagon?”

  “Of course I got a wagon. Everybody’s got a wagon. Come on.” He practically dragged me over to the freight platform. I had to hurry to keep up with his giant steps. “Which one’s yours?”

  “It’s that one.” I pointed out my trunk. He grabbed it like it was a sack of potatoes and laid it on his shoulder.

  “Come on, the wagon’s over yonder.” Again, I had to hurry to keep up with his long strides. Did this man, could this man take normal steps?

  He set the trunk in the back of a wagon that looked as if it was on its last leg. He noticed me looking it over.

  “As soon as we sell the herd we’ll be getting a new wagon and a few other things. Are you ready to go to the preacher’s house? He said you could tidy up a bit there, if you need to.”

  He helped me into the wagon. Again, nothing but flesh on flesh. How I wished for something more. Perhaps as I got to know him better there would be some kind of feeling.

  “You sure are pleasing to look at, Rose. I’m looking forward to sharing my life with you.”

  We arrived at the little church on the hill just outside of town. He jumped down, came around and offered his hand. I accepted and he helped me down, keeping a grip on my arm as if he thought I was going to run away. He knocked on the door and it was opened by an older gray haired man who was stooped and bent with age.

  “Come on in. You got the ring? You must be the bride? Of course you’re the bride, why else would you be here? Mother, we’re ready, come on in here.”

  “I was hoping I could freshen up a bit first.”

  “Of course, my dear, come with me.” I followed her into a back bedroom.

  “Here’s some water and a towel. I’m afraid that’s all the freshening up we got.”

  “This will be just fine. Tell them I will be out in just a minute. Thank you.”

  “I’ll tell them.”

  I poured water into the bowl, wet a rag and tried to wash the dust and grime off my face and neck. What I wouldn’t give for a bath right now. I had brought the white dress that I had bought back in Lewiston. I took it out of my bag, shook it to try to get the wrinkles out. I washed as much of my body as I could reach. I buttoned up, straightened my shoulders and walked back in to attend my wedding.

  Roscoe had removed his hat when we came inside. That was the only difference I noticed since I first saw him at the depot.

  “Well, come on, don’t dawdle. Let’s get this done. You stand right up here beside Roscoe. He ain’t gonna bite you, at least not yet.”

  I had never heard a preacher talk so crudely before.

  “Dearly beloved, and so forth and so on. Roscoe do you take this woman to be your wife? And you, what’d you say your name was?”

  “Rose.”

  “And do you, Rose, take this man to be your husband? Both of you say I do.”

  “I do.”

  “Roscoe, put the ring on her finger. I pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

  As he leaned down to kiss me, I turned my head so that his lips landed on my cheek. He raised up and looked at me a little funny.

  He grabbed my arm and almost dragged me outside to the wagon.

  “Hold on there, Roscoe, you owe me fifty cents for the wedding.” Roscoe dug into his pocket and gave the preacher fifty cents. He helped me up onto the wagon seat, walked around and climbed up beside me.

  “Giddy up.” He slapped the reigns and the wagon jerked as we took off. If I hadn’t been hanging on it would have thrown me to the ground.

  “How far is it to your ranch?”

  “It’s our ranch, and it’s about a four hour ride from here. I had to get up around midnight to get to the train on time. Just relax, we’ll be there before you know it.”

  The road was rough with potholes, wagon ruts and the landscape was a lot like I had seen
on the train. There were a lot of Cedar trees interspersed with Mesquite trees. A lot of scrub brush and cacti. How on earth could he have a cattle ranch with land like this? It was hot, so hot I could hardly take a deep breath. The tickling I felt between my shoulder blades was old fashioned sweat. It didn’t seem to faze Roscoe. He was hardly perspiring at all

  CHAPTER FIVE

  “It’s just a couple more miles now. Get ready for the surprise of your life.” His teeth were white once he got rid of the tobacco he was chewing. His beautiful blue eyes fairly twinkled as he told me to get ready.

  As we rounded a bend in the road I saw a small wooden structure ahead. It was rather small, only big enough for one room. Was this the cattle ranch he told me about in his letter? A hundred yards or so out was a big barn. A corral, a chicken coup and what looked like a pig pen was next to the barn.

  “Whatcha think, Rose? Ain’t she a beaut? Oh, I know it needs a little fixing up, but we’re gonna do that as soon as we sell the herd. It’ll be great, you’ll see.”

  There wasn’t anything great from the outside, maybe the inside would be better. He pulled on the reigns, set the brake and jumped down. He came around to my side, offered his hand and said,

  “Welcome home, my sweet wife.” I let him help me down to the ground.

  “You go on inside, I gotta take care of the animals. I’ll be in shortly. I’ll bring your trunk when I come in.”

  I pushed open the door. I stood until my eyes adjusted to the darkness. I felt like I was entering a dark cave.

  When my eyes adjusted enough for me to see, I noticed two windows, one on each side of the room. They were covered with oilcloth to keep the rain out I suppose. I walked over to one and pulled the cover aside. I spotted a lamp siting in the middle of the table. We were going to need it shortly. With the cover pulled to the side there was a little more light. I went to the other window and did the same thing. Now that there was enough light to see, I was thoroughly surprised. A straw filled bed in the back corner. A homemade wooden table with two chairs in the middle of the room. On the wall opposite the bed was a stove. It was a pot-bellied wood burner. Next to it was a dry sink. There were nails pounded into the wall with pots and pans hanging on them. How on earth could a person live like this? What am I saying? This is my home now. There were a few shelves built along the wall with jars of canned goods. I looked through the window and saw where the water came from. There was a well by the side of the house. I watched as Roscoe let a bucket down into the well, then pulled it up like it weighed nothing. He poured the water into another bucket, and carried it to the barn. He was going to be through pretty soon.

  Was I ready to face my new husband? I bowed my head and prayed, "Dear Lord, please give me the strength to do this. I want to be a good wife to my new husband." The barn was bigger and better looking than the house. I was standing still, looking the place over, when I heard the door open. Roscoe had to duck to come inside.

  “I was planning on cleaning it up a little before you got here, but I got busy with other things. Besides, I ain’t too good with housework. You feel like fixing something to eat?”

  I looked at him through veiled eyes.

  “What do you expect me to fix? I just got here and know absolutely nothing about where you keep things or anything.”

  “Ok. Don’t get your drawers in a bunch. I’ll throw something together, but come tomorrow, I’ll expect you to start learning where everything is located. You like beans?”

  He opened a jar of beans and poured them in a skillet, mixed in some already fried bacon and set it on the stove. He built a fire in the stove and it began to make the room that much hotter. He looked inside the coffee pot, shook it and set it next to the skillet.

  “It’ll be ready in a minute or two.”

  “Would it be possible to get enough water from that well for me to take a bath? You do have a tub, don’t you?”

  “Yeah, there’s a tub, but it’s a lot better if you go to the creek down in back of the house. That’s why I built here, because there’s a creek close by. If you want to, that is. If you would prefer a tub of water, I reckon I can carry some in for you. You want it before we eat?”

  “I’d prefer to wait until I’m clean to eat something. The creek sounds like it will do just fine. Tell me how to get there?”

  “Go out the back door straight until you get to a little rise. It’ll be just over that rise. You want I should go with you?”

  “I believe I can manage on my own. I also think you might consider cleaning up a little, if you are planning on being intimate with me.

  “My, you do speak what’s on your mind, don’t you?”

  “You didn't bring in my trunk. I need some things from it.”

  “I'll go get it right now. You seem to have a bit of a temper, don't you? Does my sweet Rose have thorns?”

  “Only when I have reason to. Please, my trunk. I’d like to take a bath.”

  He moved the skillet and coffee pot off the stove. "I'll be back in a jiffy.” I watched as he ducked under the door frame and went outside. I saw him through the doorway lift the trunk up on his shoulder, again showing his great strength. He brought it inside and set it at the end of the bed.

  "Thank you.” I opened it and reached in for soap, washcloth and towel. I also picked out a nightgown.

  “I'll be back. In the meantime, you should consider whether you want to join me in bed tonight. If you think you do, then I would suggest that you watch for my return, then you take yourself to the creek and jump in.”

  “Is it just you, or are all redheads mean spirited?”

  “The only one I can speak for is me. I don't know anything about any other redheads. Now, if you'll excuse me. I can almost feel that cool water as we speak.”

  I went through the back door and walked straight, just as he had told me. There it was. It didn't have but about two inches of water, but it had enough for me to clean this awful grime from my body. I stripped off my clothes and waded in. I knelt first and then I sat down flat. The feeling was marvelous. I soaped my hair, my body and lastly my face. Then I rinsed off. It felt so luxurious I didn't want to move. I guess I must have stayed too long, because I heard a noise and looked around. There was Roscoe coming through the bushes. I jumped up, rushed out, grabbed my clothes and hid behind a little bush.

  “Hold on there, big boy, you're supposed to wait until I'm finished.”

  “You was gone so long, I got worried. Are you alright?”

  “I'm fine. Now let me get dressed and then you can take your bath.”

  “Go ahead and get dressed. I won't look. You sure look pretty with your hair that way.”

  My hair has always been a mess. It’s all very tight kinky curls that I can’t do anything with. I put it up and little strands keep popping out all over. I dressed as fast as I could.

  “Alright, I'm going back to the house, the creek is all yours.”

  I practically ran back to the house. What was I running from? For goodness sake, he's my husband. I peeked over my shoulder and caught a glimpse of his wide back and shoulders without his shirt. My, he was big. I didn't know a person could be that big. I walked into the cabin. Nothing had changed. I dished up a plate of cold beans and bacon. It wasn't too bad because I hadn't eaten since morning on the train. I walked over to the bed. The bed clothes needed a good washing. The cabin needed a good cleaning. It looked like my work was cut out for me. I brushed the bed clothes off as best I could. I sat on the edge of the bed and tried doing something with my hair. My hair is very hard to control. It’s fuzzy tight curls that simply refuse to stay up on top of my head. There are always little strands sticking out all over my head. I brushed it as best as I could. I turned back the cover and crawled in.

  I looked up and Roscoe was standing in the doorway watching me. I felt the heat rush to my face. I scooted over as far as I could in the bed.

  "You don't have to worry, I'll not claim my husbandly rights tonight. I figure you probably
need to get to know me a little better before that happens. I'm not a monster. I’d like for my wife to want me like I want her, so when you feel you're ready, let me know. I'll be in the barn. I will, however, be ready for breakfast at sunrise. The eggs are under the dry sink. If there aren’t any, you’ll have to go to the chicken house and gather some. Watch out for Oscar though. Good night to you, my love. Sweet dreams. See you in the morning. Oh. Would it be alright if I sneak a kiss now and then?”

  “Hold on! Who’s this Oscar that I need to watch out for? And we’ll have to think about a kiss.”

  “Oscar’s our rooster. He thinks the barnyard belongs to him and him alone. He’ll attack you if you turn your back. So watch out for him.”

  With that, he turned and ducked as he went out the door.

  I can't say I wasn't relieved. No one had ever explained what went on in the bedroom. I had read some in the library, but not much. I did overhear some women in the back of the church once or twice, but not much that I understood. I only knew that I was to submit to my husband. That was in the Bible. I thought about what Roscoe had said about me getting to know him better. I believe I already did know him a little better now.

  CHAPTER SIX

  "Thank you Lord for letting me have a safe trip and for helping Roscoe understand that I may not be ready to be intimate just yet. Please help me to be the kind of wife that will bring glory and honor to your name.”

  I closed my eyes and the next sound I heard was a rooster crowing. I knew one thing that was going to change. It was this bed. I don't think sleeping on the floor would have been any worse. I got out of bed, went outside to the outhouse. I came back inside and built a fire in the stove. I picked up the bucket, took it out to the well, drew up a bucket full and emptied it into my bucket. I took it back inside. I didn't know where to dump the coffee grounds, so I walked outside the back door and poured them on the ground. I went back in, rinsed the pot, poured about four cups of water and started looking for the coffee grounds. I found them on a shelf alongside flour, meal, and various other goods. I measured four rounded spoons of coffee and dumped it in the pot. The stove was hot, so I set the pot to the side and found another skillet that wasn't dirty. The one from last night still had beans and bacon in it. I sliced eight pieces of bacon off the slab and placed them in the clean skillet. I cracked and put in four eggs right beside the bacon. It was going fine when Roscoe came in.